Dr. Scott Eilers - organic grief
The speaker introduces 'organic grieving' as a strategy to handle grief, whether regular or ambiguous. This approach involves accepting grief in whatever form it presents itself at any moment, acknowledging that the intensity of grief fluctuates like ocean tides. The speaker emphasizes that both intense and subdued periods of grief are normal and part of a healthy grieving process. It's important to allow oneself breaks from grief, as these are necessary for mental and physical recovery. The speaker advises against rushing the grieving process and encourages allowing grief to surface naturally, ensuring the process progresses at its own pace.
Key Points:
- Embrace 'organic grieving' by accepting grief as it comes.
- Grief intensity fluctuates; both extremes are normal.
- Allow breaks from grief for mental and physical recovery.
- Do not rush the grieving process; let it unfold naturally.
- Recognize that both intense and subdued grief are healthy.
Details:
1. Understanding Organic Grieving 🌊
- Grieving is a process that requires one to fully experience their emotions, and this process is not bound by a specific timeline.
- Both regular and ambiguous grief necessitate acknowledging and feeling the associated emotions to move forward effectively.
- Regular grief typically follows a loss that is recognized and acknowledged by society, whereas ambiguous grief involves losses that are not always clear or socially validated, such as the loss of a missing person or a relationship that is unresolved.
- Navigating through different types of grief involves understanding these distinctions and finding personal coping strategies, such as seeking support groups or engaging in self-reflection activities.
2. The Nature of Grief's Intensity 🌧️
- Organic grieving involves accepting and experiencing grief in its natural form and intensity as it arises, without trying to suppress or control it.
- The intensity of grief is inherently variable, which underscores the importance of allowing grief to manifest naturally rather than forcing it into a particular form or timeline.
- Understanding that grief is variable and can ebb and flow is crucial; this is a normal part of the grieving process and should be embraced rather than resisted.
- Implementing organic grieving can involve practical steps such as setting aside time for reflection, journaling, or speaking with supportive friends or therapists to process emotions as they come.
- Testimonials from individuals who have practiced organic grieving indicate improved emotional resilience and a deeper understanding of their emotions over time.
3. Experiencing the Highs and Lows of Grief 🎢
- Grief is unpredictable, with experiences likened to ocean tides, highlighting its tendency to come and go unexpectedly.
- Periods of intense grief can last from hours to weeks, during which individuals may feel overwhelmed and unable to focus on anything else, indicating significant disruption to daily life.
- The non-linear nature of grief means that after intense phases, there can be moments of temporary relief, though the grief may not fully disappear.
- This pattern allows for cyclical relief and challenge, demonstrating the complexity of managing daily activities while coping with grief.
- Personal anecdotes illustrate this unpredictability, showing how grief can suddenly reemerge during a routine activity, such as hearing a familiar song or revisiting a significant place.
4. Embracing Breaks and Allowing the Process 🕊️
- Grieving is exhausting; both mental and physical breaks are necessary.
- Periods when grief fades slightly are essential breaks that should be embraced.
- Avoid chasing after grief; allow the process to unfold naturally.
- Allowing grief to surface naturally ensures the process progresses as quickly as possible.