Courtney Ryan - Men Who Do THIS Succeed At Dating (It’s Not What You Think)
The video features a reaction to a TikTok where a woman shares her positive dating experience with a man who shows genuine effort and thoughtfulness. The man plans dates with intention, such as bringing flowers, making reservations, and accommodating her schedule. The speaker highlights that these actions demonstrate care and consideration, which are more valuable than spending money on flashy dates. The video contrasts this with the common negative narratives about modern dating, emphasizing that good men and women who appreciate effort still exist. It encourages viewers to be selective and focus on genuine connections rather than superficial attributes. The speaker also addresses negative comments on the TikTok, arguing that not all positive gestures are manipulative or indicative of ulterior motives. Instead, they can simply be signs of a good person. The video concludes by encouraging viewers to appreciate and reciprocate genuine effort in dating.
Key Points:
- Effort and thoughtfulness in dating are more important than spending money.
- Good men and women who appreciate genuine gestures still exist.
- Being considerate and planning with intention are attractive qualities.
- Not all positive gestures are manipulative; they can be genuine.
- Selectivity in dating can lead to more fulfilling relationships.
Details:
1. 🎥 Introduction and TikTok Context
- The TikTok video by creator Sam free flow achieved 1.7 million views, indicating significant resonance and viral success.
- The video's content focused on a unique dance challenge that was easily replicable, contributing to its widespread appeal.
- Sam free flow's reputation as a creative influencer helped boost the video's popularity, leveraging his existing follower base.
- User engagement was high, with thousands of comments and shares, indicating strong community involvement and interest.
- The video's timing coincided with a trending topic, amplifying its reach across the platform.
2. 🌹 A Refreshing Dating Story
- The narrator has been on three dates with a man who has demonstrated thoughtful and considerate behavior.
- On the third date, the man gave the narrator flowers, indicating a traditional and romantic gesture.
- He made a backup reservation on their date night, showing foresight and consideration for the narrator's comfort.
- When the narrator couldn't meet for matcha due to work, the man sent matcha to her house, demonstrating adaptability and thoughtfulness.
- Their fourth date involves the man flying a plane himself, showcasing his unique hobby and willingness to share personal interests.
- The man explicitly stated he dates with the intention of marriage, aligning with the narrator's relationship goals.
- The narrator's neighbor suggests perseverance in dating, implying that finding the right partner takes time and effort.
- The narrator feels she has found her 'prince,' as the man treats her exceptionally well.
3. 💡 The Importance of Effort in Dating
- Effort in dating is more impactful than flashy dates or expensive gestures.
- Planning with intention, such as getting flowers on the third date or making dinner reservations, demonstrates thoughtfulness.
- Consideration, like rescheduling around her work schedule and surprising her with favorite items, shows genuine effort.
- The existence of good partners who appreciate effort suggests that meaningful gestures are valued over monetary displays.
4. 🗣️ Being Considerate and Leading with Confidence
4.1. Consideration in Dating
4.2. Confidence in Dating
5. 💭 Modern Dating Challenges and Selectivity
- Being considerate in dating is attractive and is perceived as a sign of confidence and masculinity, not weakness.
- Leading in a relationship involves making intentional decisions, showing effort, and considering the partner's needs.
- Women prefer men who lead with confidence rather than being passive or indifferent.
- Effort should be invested in someone who reciprocates interest, distinguishing it from chasing, which is seen as needy.
- Modern dating is not hopeless; selectivity is key to finding partners who appreciate effort and commitment.
- Despite challenges like ghosting and flakiness, there are still great women who notice and appreciate genuine effort.
6. 📣 Comments and Misconceptions
- Emphasize the importance of selectivity in relationships, focusing on genuine appreciation rather than status or material gain.
- Encourage mutual appreciation and effort in dating to ensure a healthy and enjoyable relationship dynamic.
- Re-evaluate the effort in dating, ensuring it feels natural to avoid a transactional feeling that can make dating feel like a losing game.
- Address public perception issues with skepticism highlighted by comments such as 'see you in 3 months girl' (28,000 likes) and 'beware of Love bombing' (5,538 likes), indicating a widespread skepticism.
- Discuss concerns about overusing terms like 'love bombing' and 'red flags,' which can wrongly interpret positive actions as manipulative.
- Differentiate between genuine kindness and manipulation, emphasizing that not all positive actions are toxic or manipulative.
7. 🌟 Appreciating Hobbies and Realistic Expectations
- The comment 'see you in 3 months girl' received 28,000 likes, highlighting the commonality of projecting personal misfortunes onto others.
- A bouquet of flowers from Trader Joe's costs only $5.99, demonstrating that thoughtful gestures do not have to be expensive.
- Making a reservation and taking initiative in planning a date costs $0, emphasizing that effort and thoughtfulness in relationships don't require financial investment.
- Flying a plane is noted as a unique hobby, yet the focus was on the shared experience and interest in hobbies, not the cost or exclusivity.
- Women find men with hobbies attractive as it reflects passion and curiosity, qualities that are admired in personal relationships.
- The speaker notes personal admiration for a partner's niche, nerdy hobbies, which are valued for showcasing curiosity and passion.
8. 💬 Positive Dating Experiences and Lessons Learned
- Having hobbies and interests is attractive in a partner, and planning thoughtful dates with attention to detail is not unrealistic, but rather a positive expectation.
- Appreciation for thoughtful and kind gestures in dating encourages similar behavior and creates a positive dating environment.
- The notion of having to endure many failures ('kissing a million frogs') before finding success in dating is challenged, suggesting better selection could prevent this.
- Excitement about dating and sharing positive experiences can be refreshing and should be encouraged, even if the relationship is not yet 'end game.'
- Being appreciative and thankful for kind treatment in dating is important, rather than having unrealistic demands, and should be shared as a positive experience.
- The importance of taking things slow and getting to know someone before making long-term decisions, avoiding premature judgments.
- Learning from dating experiences, even if they don't work out, is valuable and should be seen as a lesson rather than a failure.
9. 🔗 Encouragement and Viewer Engagement
- Engage with thoughtful and appreciative individuals to build stronger reciprocal relationships. Avoid investing effort in uninterested parties.
- Promote positive content consumption to counteract negative dating perceptions by encouraging refreshing and uplifting interactions.
- Foster a sense of community by inviting viewers to share personal dating experiences, thus opening dialogues and building connections.
- Enhance channel interaction by encouraging likes, subscriptions, and comments, thereby increasing viewer participation and engagement rates.
- Utilize other platforms like Instagram for broader audience engagement, thus expanding reach and interaction opportunities.
- Actively request content suggestions for reaction videos, which increases viewer participation, relevance, and connection to the content.